The fences have long since been taken down, and yet it’s hard to get accustomed to the passive air that district 12 now holds. Its peaceful, florid, a place having been erased of any trace of what it used to be: no more agony, violence and no more games. I walk out of the woods slowly, hearing the odd crackling of branches. I’m certain it’s probably a stray animal and pay no attention, when I hear a voice coming out from the big maple. A maple tree where, not even 21 years ago I jumped to escape the new peacekeepers that had been deployed to control district 12.
Peacekeepers. Children now exist like there were no hunger games, which is good... in a sense. I want to explain it to mine, tell them how it was, tell them about those who I loved and lost but now; it seems a thousand times harder, to think back. Peeta still has nightmares, and I can’t say my nights are devoid of them. Perhaps putting it off may be a better alternative for the time being.
Without warning, I hear a loud booming voice:
"CATNIP!" The next thing I know I’m on the ground, staring at the long blades of grass whilst attempting to free myself from the iron grasp that suddenly has me, fighting like a kid. Gale.
He looks at me, apparently amused by this situation.
"Still got it in you, huh?" he grins, giving me a highlighted wink.
He gives my shoulder a pat as I attempt getting up, frustrated, flustered and covered in smothered grass blades.
"What do you expect?" I try to sound stern and I give his shoulder a small shove to add to the effect. This is yet another one of my useless attempts to deflect Gales takedowns. We sit back against the maple tree, his arm around me, my head resting on his shoulder, brushing the dark strands away. Gale hasn't lost his warmth, I realize, as he holds me tight against the old Maple.
"So..." I try, sounding as unintentional as I can, "when are you going Back to District 2? I think you could stay just a while longer."
"Katniss..." he interrupts. Not again, I have to make my point.
"No! I’m serious. I know you try to visit often but it would be a lot easier if you tried to stay, I mean, you and Peeta are such good friends and Finn and Rose adore you."
I’m laying it on thick but I know it’s most likely working in my favor.
He gives me a dejected look, somewhat exaggerated and feigns wiping away a solemn tear away from his cheek.
-"Just them, huh?" he chuckles, lightly shaking.
-"Oh shut up. FINE. Yes, I'd like you to stay. And I know your family would love and feel at home here. Its technically where they belong."
Gale contemplates this. He's just as good-looking now as he was before, slightly aged, as we all are but still in great shape from running all those training programs back in District 2. He hasn't lost that Seam look though, the dark hair, green eyes and olive skin. Every time I mention his family, it stills feels weird saying it: Gale has a family now. What happened was: 20 years ago, after the uprisings were finished and the Capitol overthrown, Gale moved to District 2. Delly happened to be there, starting up a new business in collaboration with my mother, who was communicating with her from her place in District 4. The collaboration was all about establishing hospitals around the districts. It didn't take anyone long to notice the ironic draw between Gale and Delly as their jobs interwove. And before you knew it, we had news that they were dating, then married, and then with children. I always tease him about it because Delly and Peeta were good friends and this links us all in a bit of an incongruous way.
Gale looks at me, opens his mouth and hesitates, as if weighing the pros and cons.
"I try, you know I do. I’m sure Prim and Vick would like it too, being with Rose and Finn... but still, I have to go back and get all the things sorted out in District 2 before I can come back again. IF I do." he says, looking up at the sky absentmindedly.
Gale has these moments, when he can go from being serious to amused in an instant and appears to have momentarily spaced out. This gives me time to check around, as I seem to have lost track of time, so I take out my pocket watch. It’s actually Plutarch Heavensbee’s, but I got it as a gift from him, a few months into moving back to District 12.
-"Poop." I mutter, looking at my watch, I’m late for lunch. By an hour. But something else takes my mind off this matter. In instants, I see that Gale has fallen onto the grass and is seemingly rocking himself back and forth.
He's rolling on the floor, laughing too hard to speak: he's basically panting. I'm not especially tickled by this as it’s clear he's making fun of me. Flustered, I get up, readying myself to walk away and not really bothering to find out why I'm being targeted, when his arm, obviously just as strong now, pulls me down. I slump down on the grass next to him, silently, trying to keep up my angered expression.
"...Poop? What are you, 4?" He manages to say, within breaks of shaky laughter.
As he sits up I realize the taunting isn't nearly over so I hit him in the arm as a precaution. Gale is way more relaxed with his kids than I am.
"Ow. Okay! I get it, you're trying to get some good wording into your kids. It’s just funny to here you adhere to that" he grins. His lips part as if he’s about to say something else but they instantaneously close again as he looks up at the blue sky, subduing an evident smirk.
"Just say it" I moan, irritated
"What... if, because of all of this: Rose turns out just like Effie?" and there he goes, wheezing with laughter, eyes beaming. This is really unlike Gale to laugh this much, I must be really entertaining him. This is so abnormal of him I decide to let it go, even though I judge that comment to deserve a good kick in the gut.
I think Gale realizes he's pushed it a tad too far and sits up in strained muteness, next to me, perceptibly suppressing a sneer. Again, his face takes on that serious expression again, "You know, I thought I saw Effie, back while I was going through district four... its weird because I saw her and…I think she's married. Or with someone, at least"
Nothing can hide the shock on my face, so I mask it with an attempt at a well-meaning grin, which makes me feel bad because Effie is very nice, mostly on the inside. Of course Gale picks it up, but he has the courtesy to pretend he hasn't. We both know we have to get back, its late and even though it somewhat troubles me to admit it, Gale does have to leave soon if he wants to sort things out to eventually, perhaps move back. He stands up and pulls me up and we walk hand-in-hand until we get back to my house. My house is different now, I no longer live in the Victor's Village as it was too agonizing of a reminder so, in a sense, I’m glad the houses were destroyed by Officer Paylor’s orders. After about a mile's worth, we arrive at my house. It’s resembles a little cottage, not my type but it reminds me of Prim and the meadow. Before either of us can make it through the door we are attacked by two creatures bursting out of the front door: my kids.
"Mom! You missed lunch. And so did you uncle gale, I spent a lot of time on it with Dad. But it's ok, because I saved you some for each. Tell me what you think after you’ve had some." says Rose, matter-of-factly.
She reminds me of Prim every day and it takes a lot not to think back to that day, the dainty silver parachutes, the crowd of children: when my sister was transformed into a human-torch by the capitol. That's why I named her Rose, because, apart from the fact she bore an uncanny resemblance to my little sister, it felt like I needed a reminder. Gale also did a huge part in naming his daughter Prim, which at first angered me, but then became a soothing action, knowing that he had realized his part and that it meant something. It helped us mend some bridges.
"Uncle Gale, you still have to send me those books about the games, like you promised. Also, you said you’d tell me about the tributes and things!" bellows Finn.
And that's when everyone in the room freezes. Even Rose can sense that something’s gone wrong. I can almost see the blood drain out of Gale's face. Obviously his plan didn’t play out accordingly.
"What games?" I ask Finn sternly, looking directly at Gale.
Finn hesitates, knowing he's treading over dangerous waters. "Just... this one game, from a while ago.." His attempt at being vague would be amusing, if I wasn’t so infuriated by what Gale had just done.
I know exactly what's going on and as much as I would love to take down Gale right now and kill him then and there, a part of me understands exactly where he's coming from. Okay, so I’ll try and make this go as smoothly as I can.
I relax and put on a bit of a mysterious voice: "Ahh, the Hunger Games. I’ll also tell you a little bit about them. In fact, you know I was in two of those. And so was your father, and we won. Both of them."
I can spot Peeta's radiant smile from behind the door as he steps out holding what can only be a tray of fresh buns, seemingly unaffected by the turn of discussion.
"Well not exactly" he says with a wide grin, "There were a lot of other people who helped us out in there, without whom we wouldn’t have done so well". At this point a trace of grief creeps into his eyes, but Peeta being Peeta shakes it away in seconds before anyone else can pick up on it.
It does pain me that the kids seem so innocent, they don’t know about hurt, about what we went through, and at the same time, it feels like that's exactly what I wanted for them. Of course I’ve made sure that they’ve met the tributes and friends from back then, but they have no idea what that means, its just family to them. They know Annie though, she always comes for their birthdays and other events and is definitely a favorite in the family due to her unlimited kindness and imagination, what with her son Finnick Jr. who is by far the favorite cousin due to my sons identical name, thus providing a constant source of amusement. Annie's son is a portrait of Finnick; achingly perfect face, seductive voice, twisted humor and all. It really feels nice when he comes around as he reminds me of old times, the good parts.
And the kids, for whatever reason adore Haymitch (who has long since sobered up)- he's still cold but has an obvious soft spot for Finn and Peeta. Effie sends cards and makes the odd appearance every year, decorated with lavish stones and plastic miniatures and insists she be considered part of the family, ordering everyone around on schedules she creates for the day with a smile that never leaves her face. She's somewhat more annoying now that not following her schedules doesn't translate into death for Peeta and I but... we stand her, she obviously really cares about us. All of these people are our family, not to mention Gale, who Rose can't pull away from and who Fin looks up to so much. But our kids... they don’t know how we got to this, WHY these people are our family. In a way its good that Gale did that, helpful, if anything.
Peeta treads down the steps carefully, walks over and pulls me in from behind to plant a soft kiss on my cheek.
"You know..." he says tentatively, eyeing the kids " we could show the kids our secret book". He pauses for dramatic effect, waiting for a reaction. It’s almost funny how he emphasizes words when talking to them.
And with that the kids go crazy, screaming out questions and pressing for more. Words... Peeta was always the best with them, whereas I am still rather hopeless when it comes to expressing myself. This day seems like it’s going to be a tough one, and a nap doesn't seem like such a bad idea. I should have known though that moments like these never last. When things can’t get any more problematic, a known figure steps onto the curb. Dressed in tight leather hunting clothes with a wavy auburn hairdo, shadowy makeup, and still sporting a teenagers figure after 20 years. Of course.
Johanna Mason.
We became close back in the rebellion times when we trained and roomed together. She comes around but never fails to stir up some trouble before she leaves. I know she knows we are family so it’s ok. We talk often and I do check up on her, much to her discontent, which is exaggerated.
Peeta has also bonded with her as they developed a sort of friendship, back when they were abducted by the Capitol during the Quarter Quell. He sometimes even visits her back in District 7 and fills me in, and as recent news indicate, even though she’ll never admit it, her and Finnick's brother have something going on. She refuses to talk about it but I can spot the sporadic blush. Tremendously uncommon for Johanna, so: we all know its something.
She grins as the kids run towards her and gives them each a light hug.
"Your monsters look happier to see me than you do" she says with a wink and a hint of sarcasm.
She walks over and gives me a hug, intentionally giving my hair a sharp tug and slightly shocking me in the process and proceeds to embrace Gale and Peeta. Throughout those 15 years she visits a few times a year and has gotten a hell of a lot nicer and its... nice to have her over, despite the cutting remarks, harsh sarcasm and language that would make any parent want to kill themselves. But she too, is family.
"We are very happy to have you over" assures Peeta with a sincere smile, offering her a hot bun whilst him and Gale devour what's on the tray.
"I like him better than I like you" she says pointedly at me, mouth curved into a half smile "What are you guys doing?"
Obviously she doesn't presume an explanation of her arrival in necessary. I’m thinking we might have to put the hunger game talk off.
And then a thought occurs: Who cares. If we are going to get through and explain the hunger games to a bunch of innocent kids, she might as well be there, so I shrug "Hunger Games explanation..." trying to sound utterly in control of the situation.
Her face remains passive but I can see it in her eyes, she's elated to be a part of this. Her expression adopts a new shine and she smirks,
“You know, if you want to make it more real, you should probably introduce them to Enobaria." Judging by her hushed chuckle towards the end of her sentence, even she knows that’s not going to happen.
"Kidding. Brainless." she says, looking right at me, "Though you should call Haymitch over. And I hear that Octavia and Flavius are doing some sort of show back in 11, apparently “lavender” is the new thing there. By the way...Annie's decided to visit me out of nowhere and she does get on my nerves so I left and came here."
I think Johanna grins at the look of disbelief on our faces as we register that she’s just left Annie behind in District 7.
She breathes a sigh and eyes all of us like were stupid;
"Call people over to make it real for the monsters... just not Annie. She'll have followed me here for sure, I know it. Expect her anytime; think she took the train cabin behind mine. Crazy woman. I took young Finnick with me but I lost him when we crossed a schoolyard full of girls a mile back."
She's definitely got a point, so we'll be anticipating her and Finnick Jr. any time soon. As we all mull over what's going to happen very soon, something peculiar occurs: I can see a bit of anguish and torment on everyone's faces, including hers. We all know what it is: memories come flickering back, one by one. Finnick's death, Peeta's torture, Johanna's electro-shocks, Madge and Prim's death, Cinna's bloodbath, Boggs, Mitchell, Messalla... It takes about a minute of unpleasant stillness before we start talking again, each of us a teeny bit rickety but doing a decent job hiding it.
Peeta smiles " Okay, Finn, Rose, Ill get the book out tonight and Ill call Aunt Annie to make sure she’s coming as well as Finnick Jr., and I’ll try and get a couple of other friends. I might even be able to squeeze in Haymitch. Tomorrow we'll talk about the Games" He ruffles Fin’s hair and caresses Rose’s soft cheeks.
Finn and Rose are clearly over the moon and walk up to their bedrooms, eagerly going over plans for tomorrow.
Johanna pauses, and gives us all an exuberant beam as she points to the bun-tray Peeta is still holding up.
"Eat up, this is amazing” she exclaims, a little too opportunely. Gale and Peeta mindlessly as obediently shove some more hot buns into their mouths until their faces appear near distorted.
This is strange. Johanna starts snickering, she had something planned all along: you can tell. She waits until they seem to be face-full with food and rapidly exclaims
"Remember when I went full-nude in front of Peeta in the elevator during the quarter quell?!"
Peeta and Gale simultaneously choke on their pieces of bread sending Johanna into a fit of winded laughter. Mission accomplished.
She looks at me, still somewhat shaking at the triumph of her latest prank.
"You should have seen your face!" she attempts to state in all seriousness, grinning at my palpable discomposure “You looked so angry. Stupid.”
I suppress a smile because I remember this exactly. I wasn't too happy about it back then. She knew, she knew exactly what she was doing and it was making her very happy.
After a few seconds she returns to her old self and peers into the house tentatively, swirling around to face me,
-"I don’t like your house, its too preppy. Make sure I get a nicer room this time, last time's was awful and I refuse to spend a minute there, I’ll go take a nap in your room. Don’t wake me up after I’m asleep. I’ll kill you." she states, relaxed, and walks into the house, ignoring the two men lying on the grass, still trying to recover.
I go to the dining room and sit down for my daily ruminations, too busy to care for the idiots on my lawn: my best friend and my husband. At the dinner table, thoughts rush back to me, repressed emotions. Suddenly; I really miss Prim and Finnick...and Rue and I feel an inexpressible pain inside when I think of them. I'm wearing one of Cinna's creations right now and this just seems to aggravate me. I have the bag I kept from her and I also have this painting that Peeta did, just her in the clearing, smiling into the azur. Peeta has helped me deal with this greatly, as soon after we moved in together he painted a portrait of Prim concocting cures in the District 13 hospital, and it's in Rose's room now and there's also one of Finnick laughing against a tree in the arena in Fin's room. Peeta also painted a portrait of that Girl, the morphling from District 6, painting a flower on his face. She was the one who died for him during the monkey attack; he keeps the painting inside his art room. This let's me know that even after all these years: he hasn't forgotten. I think of Gale, those 2 years we spent with minimal contact, all that resentment and blame.
Gale and I still carry some strain from Prim's death and I can't admit that I'm over the fact I believe he was partially the cause of her dying, but things have mellowed out long since and we just try to get past that. Were not all we used to be but truly on the way to being so. Anyway, it’s good that the kids are finally learning about this, so that in conscience, those mistakes are never repeated.
I begin to feel radiant warmth behind me, slowly increasing in its intensity.
Peeta sneaks in behind me, obviously still red from the hot bun incident and sits down a little bit behind me on the chair, positioning me on his lap. I watch as Gale jogs up the stairs, on the way to talk to Johanna about god-knows-what, but judging by the colossal smirk on his face, probably something I don't want to venture into finding out.
I feel Peeta's warm, strong hands; surround my waist as he draws me close. After a small moment he brushes my hair and burrows his face into my neck, and after a few seconds of silence, he whispers in my ear: "I love you, Girl on fire" and with that, I feel whole. Nothing, not really, can bring me down, and I know I can let myself unwind, feeling guarded, and I can safely say I'm happy, happier than I have ever been.
"
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